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...ruin it for everyone... |
Doteasy
| I have been thinking a lot lately about family...fun...and the nature of entropy.?Entropy is, of course, the process through with all things end.?It is a natural digression, a falling apart, the center cannot hold.Family is a support group comprised of people who, for reasons of common interest, enjoy each other's company and emotional strength.?Fun is...subjective.?Everyone can agree that one person's fun can be another's personal hell.?But, fun with a group, family or kind acquaintances is the goal of anyone with an eye to social congress.?Some find fun in reading, going to museums, exploring ancient monuments and shifting history to find a contiguous thread of humanity's progress.?Some others find fun in endless parties, dance clubs and light social meetings where the subjects of movies, television and friends love lives the conversational depth of the day.?Others find fun in sharing a common experience of freedom from everyday convention, Burning Man, yearly pilgrimages to Las Vegas, various religious retreats or conventions of recreational or professional interest.?All of these are fun for some and some can be fun for all.Unfortunately all of these activities have one thing in common; they all end.?Entropy again.?For some reason every trend, every place of fun, every group, every activity attracts those who would take advantage of an establishments' trust that everyone attending is there to have "fun".?Take a certain pizza place that has an unaccountable attraction for the very young.?We will call it, for legal reasons, Pete's Pepperoni Palace...you get the idea.?Originally the owners and creators of this Vegas for the Very Young only wanted to make a tidy profit offering a place for parents and coaches to bring the youngsters in their care to have some simple, childish recreation.?Cardboard pizza, some simple electronic entertainment and outdated video games seemed the very thing.?Parents could pat themselves on the back that the kiddies weren't watching the boob-toob and coaches could "reward" their teams with some energy-burning running around time before returning their charges to their parents.?Then come the FunBusters...not, surprisingly, the government, but predators.?Pete's Pepperoni became a supermarket for the pedophile.?Now, not only do they not let you in without a kid, you are stamped with a number matching one stamped on the child you bring.?They now have to stop you on the way out and check the numbers to make sure you are taking what belongs to you.?Some have even instituted a number limit of adults to children so that you can reasonably watch all the kids in your care.?Sad really.?Another example could be the Summer of Love in 1969 when a certain music group hired the Hell's Angels as "Security" for a free concert.?Let's just say that didn't go well.?Or how about the olde time soda shop??A jukebox and some jitterbug over pie or an ice-cream soda...how could that be a bad thing??Well, when certain hoodlums decided to gang up on the nice owners and the good kids just there for an innocent good time.?They bust up the joint, harass the kids and loiter in the parking lot...bye bye soda shops.?Who can afford the trouble??Ruined by the few the many had to suffer with the consequences.?Even great institutions like the large amusement parks have suffered under this trend.?No longer can a couple go alone to many of them for an intimate date.No, you have to have more people with you so you don't go to the bathroom alone for fear of assault.?Now, those of you who know me are probably wondering where I am going with this.?There are two subjects which provoke my ire today.?One is a fabulous idea started here in Florida for a gathering of pagans to simply enjoy each other's company in peace.?Without fear of others overhearing their conversations and be allowed to discuss books, politics and philosophy in a nurturing environment.?Young and old could find peace, enlightenment and...uh oh, here it comes...fun.?It grew from a simple thing; a gathering in one place, some drumming, perhaps a local speaker to teach a class, some chanting and a ritual to commemorate the nearest holiday.?Well, as truly spiritual gatherings in the deep South are a rare thing, this idea proved very popular.?So popular they found they had to elaborate a bit.?Bigger guest speakers, bigger rituals, bigger space, security and emergency medical services and a bureaucracy...and this all had to be paid for.?So far so good, for such an elaborate and fanciful occasion more and more people were willing to pony up the increasing fees.?Where else can the pagan in FL meet and greet people from all over the state and the country and find friends they have learned to treasure even tho' only meeting in person twice a year??But now we come to the "fun" part again.?After the workshops, classes, discussion groups and meditation, quite a few pagans feel like letting loose a little.?Now we could have a problem...some people find it quite enough to sip a little libation and have a deep discussion in the lantern light, some want to drum the stars down, others want to dance to those drums (some of them wearing very little or no clothing) some want to party down with lots of libation and louder drums and of course, since it is a party, lots of people are looking to get lucky.? |
| Now we could have a problem...some people find it quite enough to sip a little libation and have a deep discussion in the lantern light, some want to drum the stars down, others want to dance to those drums (some of them wearing very little or no clothing) some want to party down with lots of libation and louder drums and of course, since it is a party, lots of people are looking to get lucky.?Now this shouldn't be a problem.?The gathering is private, the wristbands clearly mark who is nookie-able and who is not...they even give away condoms at the front gate and most of the security/medical people have them in a pocket (if you ask really nicely) so what's the problem??The problem is the FunBusters...people who, for reasons of their own can't keep their twice be-damned fingers out of other people's good time.?There are many ways this happens...clogging the toilet, leaving the place they are a mess, complaining that other people's good time is too loud for your good time and of course the Persistent Pesterer...stalker, if you will.?Now, I have no issue with a guy who catches some cutie's eye and begins a courtship which he sincerely hopes will get him a little somethin'-somthin'...as long as he checks the wristband.?I do object to the little cutie who disguises her age and tricks some hapless rube into a make-out session to which the parents strongly object.?While this is unfortunate, it can be cleared up.?What I also object to are the "I drink therefore I am sexy" types.?These are the PartyPoopers for any gathering, whether a cocktail party, dinner party or large, multi-day pagan partaaaay.?So, now what is an organization to do??Set up a system of confrontation mediation.?Well that's good as far as it goes, but it can go too far.?Where a simple "Sir, please stop bothering the lady, you are making her and everyone uncomfortable." would do, instead they threaten them with expulsion and all sorts of alarums and excursions.?This kind of fuss makes people who have actual problems hesitant to go to the camp authorities even when a real problem presents itself.?If someone is merely being persistent while drunk, don't go to the official course unless you are there alone and genuinely frightened.?In front of your friends, tell the guy you are not interested and to please go away.?However, if you feel dizzy, disoriented, strange and think perhaps you have either had too much to drink or even slipped a miki, go to the good guys and tell them everything.?Go to your friends and bring them with you.?But I digress.?What I am actually leading to is this; we now have predators at our gathering.?They are everywhere it seems.?These predators find out about any place that people are enjoying themselves and descend to take advantage.?Male, female, gay, straight, attractive and homely they come in all guises.?What to do??Rope off the naked people, make naked un-allowed until after 10pm, have roving security; but what else can we do??What really can we do??They are here, they must be accounted for.?Just as no woman should ever walk down a darkened street in a bikini wearing all her jewelry and a bulging wallet in her hand, perhaps we need to separate those very young from the rest after 10pm...a curfew??Perhaps just some advice on walking alone in the night??What can we do??I am very much afraid for our gathering...entropy approaches.?Now to the second subject...I know the first was long, but bear with me a moment.?Friends..."because you gotta have friends..."?We all have them; close ones who know every dirty little secret and habit and love us anyway, pleasant company that you can ask to drive you to the airport, friendly acquaintances who fill out our party invitations and meet us for coffee or a movie.?Groups and clusters, some never meet, some meet and move on.?Some close groups remain in tact for years and others simply wear away like a marange in champagne.?Entropy again.?I have seen many groups come and go, some gently and others with a bang.?It appears the longer and stronger a group seems the worse the ending when it falls.?There doesn't seem to be one general cause.?It has been everything from a health crisis of a member that most memebers cannot handle, to a power play by a busy-body that cuts the group in half and sends the rest scattering.?Occasionally it is the core members of the formally tight group falling into a difference of opinion and then it is anyone's guess where everyone goes.?The only thing that is certain among the survivors is a certain feeling of loss and gentle grief for what was lost.?Entropy again...the center cannot hold...and all the meetings and all the loyalty in the world cannot hold against the inevitable.?To grow is to live...change is life...the only constant is change...the only hope is that love and friendship can survive change.So...who wants custody of the FlaskMan and Stitchwitch? |
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Last Updated ( Thursday, 17 July 2008 )
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